how it is to be an ambivert

how it is.jpg

📷 from tumblr: ripmango

I love talking about personalities. It’s just so interesting. I like trying to understand why people act and think in a certain way. When I found out about this personality called ambivert, I thought maybe I fall in this category. A person who is neither an introvert nor an extrovert.

If you know me personally, you’d think that I’m a total extrovert. You would always see me smiling and laughing out loud and barely see me sad or lonely in the middle of somewhere. I genuinely feel the most fulfilled when I am able to make people smile, laugh and make them feel special as well.

I am a very enthusiastic person and tend to get incredibly energetic and hyper when I’m surrounded with people I like. I would sometimes make inappropriate jokes, make fun of my friends and start teasing them just to have a good laugh. But don’t worry, I know my limitations. I know if I already went below the belt and once I do, I’d sincerely apologize right away. I don’t like being surrounded with negative minded people and trying to make fun and bad-mouth others just to make themselves feel or look good.

You would find me feeling thrilled about attending events or occasions for I do love social interaction. Deep down, I’m sort of worried to mess things up (first impressions) and be embarrassingly awkward but thankfully I always still manage to get along well. It’s not difficult for me to strike and hold a conversation with strangers. I would most likely ask several questions about you that you might actually feel like you’re having a job interview, or perhaps think that I’m being a creeper. But really tho, I just want to get to know you more as a person. I’m drawn to people and it’s truly fascinating to hear you talking about yourself passionately. After those interactions, don’t expect me to text/chat you first for I, 100%, won’t do that. It isn’t my thing.

But once you show how interested and serious you are with wanting to be friends with me, I would definitely show more interest in you. I just don’t like small talk. Not that I hate it. I would just prefer to be more engage in a meaningful and deep conversation because that’s how I am.

There will be times where I would always crave for some time alone. I could still remember when I was ranting to my best friend, probably also due to stress from uni, that I was so tired of people and wish I had only one friend because that would be less stressful for me. You know, it’s better to have one true friend than be with tons of people who you don’t even know if they really are your friends. Just because people hang around you and laugh with you doesn’t mean that they’ll stick with you through thick and thin.

I love being alone as much as I love being with people. Not because I feel like I don’t have friends or I’m lonely, but because I choose to. I love the idea of being independent. Being alone and surrounded by people equally make me happy.

When I’m with my circle and the conversation caught my interest, I would be more than involved and engaged otherwise, I won’t talk. Like you’d really see how I find everything uninteresting and boring.

On the other hand, when I am at home, my mom would always tease me. She says that I’m like an invisible person for I don’t really talk a lot. I’m either on my phone (instagramming/tumblring) or laptop. Not that I don’t like conversing with them, it’s just that home is the only place where I could enjoy being quiet. It’s like I’m recharging to have my full energy again when I go out. But when I’m really feeling good and in the mood, I join them.

I can be truly friendly to anyone but it’s so hard for me to trust people. I could tell you things that would make you feel like you already know everything about me but truth is you don’t know me that much yet. I may seem like a talker but I would love to hear more about you. I always find it really interesting to know how life treats you. I get to learn from you and your experiences. I feel comfortable talking about my feelings and things happening to me to only handful of people. Most likely, my sister and my four best friends. I am also actually very careful about whom I call my “best friend”. And once I talk, it would be difficult for me to stop. I’ll always find something to say.

I am this kind of person who would either ignore you or blow up your phone. I can get super clingy. You’d find me sending messages to my friends and making plans but there will always be times that you’d feel like I’m pushing you away and being seriously distant and don’t want to be contacted. When I fail to answer your calls, I’m probably enjoying my time alone at home. Don’t think that I hate you, I just don’t want to be bothered and have no energy to talk to anyone. I still love you though.

Sometimes I wouldn’t think twice if you ask me out to go somewhere but other times, I’d lazily say no just because and would possibly make excuses like my mom didn’t allow me.

I feel like I understand people way easier and could get along with any types for I could somehow put myself in their shoes. I know how it feels like to be both an introvert and extrovert. I want people to feel that I do understand them and I honestly care for them. I am easy to be with, flexible and adaptable.

It’s hard for me to get mad at people for I always want them to feel comfortable around me and just be open about things.

Partying actually sounds fun but if you’re going to make me choose, I certainly prefer chilling in a coffee shop and just talk about life. I love theme parks. I love how hype and positive the ambiance is, but for a person who you’d expect to be down for extreme rides, you would witness me enjoying kids ride. You will never be able to convince me riding a roller coaster. Sight-seeing would be great. Road trip without any specific destination would be fantastic.

I also love the idea of travelling alone and meet up with people once I get to the destination.

There will be times where I would like to go home alone and just put my headphones and zone out and other times, I would like someone to accompany me as so I wouldn’t feel so drained for not talking the entire time on the way home.

I sometimes like sticking to plans but other times I just want to be spontaneous and have fun.

I may seem like enjoying being the center of attention, but I do get insanely nervous and anxious most of the time. Being complimented makes me uncomfortable and speechless. If I have noticed that there’s someone who happens to be way more energetic and enthusiastic than I am, I lay low. I’d give them the spotlight and be one of the audience.

I love social media. I like sharing photos on Instagram and Snapchat but I don’t like tweeting things about my personal life. Like my feelings and whatnot. I don’t like people to know things about me. In some way I want to be a mystery. I want people to wonder what I am up to and not gossip about the things that I post on twitter. I don’t like people to see me being so dramatic. I don’t want to just let anyone into my world.

I love observing and analyzing people from a far. I love trying to know them through their actions and how they talk, their attitude towards people.

People I know would definitely not see me as someone who loves reading. I love reading young adult novels and such. And surely they’d be really shock if they knew that I enjoy writing as well.

Every time I tell my friends that I’m seriously shy and a quiet type of person they think I’m kidding.

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21 thoughts on “how it is to be an ambivert

  1. You discovered yourself !! So did I .. The first impression thing is a real challenge for me. I took a standered test in Psychology to test my personality. How about you giving a try? You seem interested! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. A total description about you! Now I know a little more about you. The only thing I knew about you before this article was that you hate negativity. I strongly believe that knowing a person by reading about him/her is drastically different from actually being a part of his/her life and you’ve also slightly touched that thought if I have got it right! As usual a great reading experience.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Relatable…..but u can equally tweet without talking about what’s actually going on in your life & no one will know what’s going on with you….tweeting about something funny and indulging with other people in conversation is also fun..you might want to try that. I love this article though…. It’s real. 👌

    Like

  4. Such an interesting way to describe yourself! I see a lot of myself in your description. I LOVE to know people. To get inside of their brain and understand them. It truly is fascinating.
    This was such a refreshing insight into your mind. Thank you.

    Like

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